Emotions

As most of you know I am a pretty emotional person. I am very passionate about what I believe in, not just my religious beliefs but everything. When things happen I tend to let my emotions get the best of me.....a LOT! I often say things or do things that I dont think about what will happen when I do. This is one quality I DO NOT LIKE about myself. I know I hurt feelings and it makes me look like a bad person and friend with no intentions of trying to do that.

Recent events have happened in my church and it has led my emotions to be at an all time high. I know I have definitely let them get the best of me this week w/out even thinking of what I am doing/saying or the outcome. Which in turn has led me to feel like I am a bad person/friend for not controlling them and keeping them on the down low.

I am working in my church's nursery for a few weeks during the service we attend and I just so happen to have the speaker on in there today and heard most of the sermon, which is something I REALLY needed to hear. It really spoke to me. It basically talked about how even though we might be hurting we need to be a healer. Dont let our emotions or actions allow us to pick up the stone and throw it. Instead we need to leave it where it lies and be the healer. It really made me think of how I feel and what my emotions are like. I need to not be that stone thrower, I need to be the healer.

I strive every day to be a good loyal person. To stand up for my faith and beliefs and to be the best friend a person could ask for. Often times I feel like no one wants to do things with me or hang out with me outside of a group setting b/c of how passionate I am about my beliefs and because I can let my emotions get the best of me. It's just who I am and I hate that quality about me but it's something that I am working on changing but it's SO incredibly hard.

I strive to surround myself and my children with loyal people, ones who have similar beliefs (even if they dont, that is completely fine with me) as I do. I try to instill in my children how good it is to be a good compassionate person and to be kind and show God's love in all they do. I certainly cant do that very well when I fail at it myself. Thankfully my God loves me enough to grant me forgiveness and grace in all I do. Without him I wouldnt be here today or be the person I am today. His grace is unending!